Since Jane’s untimely death last Wednesday, this week has been filled with plenty of tears and regular Skype calls (Praise God for modern technology which allows us to speak face-to-face even though we’re so far apart!)… it has all felt unreal as we have sought to come to terms with the gaping hole Ed’s Mum will leave… but our heavenly Father has been tangibly with us and we have all felt supernaturally strengthened and given the ability to cope – it is SUCH a comfort to know that Jane is in a much better place and that we will see her again one day!

They are having a private family funeral tomorrow and then there is a memorial service planned for the 22nd January…

The scan this morning revealed that our little fighter is STILL alive (to the utter amazement of the entire medical team!), but his heart beat is much weaker and it is very likely that he will not survive much longer (unless the Lord works a miracle!) The healthy baby is still doing well – so no real change (which is a good thing)…

Each week the obstetrician re-affirms the need for continued bed rest, but this morning I thought I’d ask some more probing questions to try and find out how long this is likely to last… it was a hard blow to be told that I will definitely be on strict bed rest until at least week 30 of my pregnancy (I am currently at the start of week 19), and that even if they allow me to get out of bed after this, I am not going to be able to do more than little bits of walking around the house for the entire pregnancy… apparently I just have to try and make sure that gravity exerts as little pressure on my cervix as possible… so I’m going to be laid up for quite some time yet… understandably, this prospect has made me quite tearful, but then I was reminded that God only gives us strength for TODAY – I can trust he’ll keep giving me strength for each new day (as he has done so far) and that he’ll provide for all the things I’m tempted to worry about (e.g. having enough strength to cope with the demands of a newborn, getting the nursery ready, buying baby clothes/a cot etc, how we’ll cope when Ed has to go back to the uk for the memorial service)… it is such a comfort to know that God is working out His good and perfect plan for our lives through all this and that I don’t need to fret!